The Insanity of Grief
by Angel of Music - Lone Wolf
Summary: 'Whoever that said the last step in dealing with grief was acceptance was an idiot.' Just as the Largos managed to build their lives after the Final Opera, tragedy strikes. Not that it would matter, of course, they were only competitors...right?


**Disclaimer: Ok the usual, I don't own Repo (unfortunately). All I have is a worn out DVD which refuses to play Seventeen and Happiness is a Warm Scalpel. **

Luigi Largo, son of ex-corporate mogul and savior, Rotti Largo, stood petrified. He would not believe his eyes; he refused to. Every ounce of anger, of sheer feeling, was replaced by an ice-cold pure, unadulterated fear. He shook as he fell to his knees, fumbling as he turned the blood soaked body. "Pavi, you little shit, don't you dare." Sheer desperation drove the thrusting hands beneath the pale neck. Cold lifeless eyes, whose expression of shock went unsheltered by the mask adorned, gazed unseeingly at Luigi and realization dawned long before his hands stopped their useless struggle. "Paviche, you little shit."

* * *

><p>The lovely, reformed Amber Sweet discovered her brother cradled in Luigi's arms. For half an appalling minute, she stood, convinced that it was Luigi's handiwork. She yelled, she cursed and she screamed at the ex-heir apparent bordering almost on a mad frenzy. She calmed as she discovered a sole bullet hole instead of the knife-wound she expected. She coolly turned to her henchwoman and ordered the usual clean up, ignoring the murderous glare directed at her.<p>

* * *

><p>Exhaustion burned through the young Ms Sweet; she rubbed her eyes in a futile effort to dispel the lethargy that flooded her. It was moments like this that she missed being the old carefree little druggie she was. Where was the Graverobber and his stash of Z when you needed it? She sighed and turned to her Eunuch, "Go drag that useless brother of mine out of bed and get him to help me." Useless to keep them really, she had hundreds of mice scattering under her that she didn't really need her old fetch boys. Still, perhaps she should have sent a Gentern instead. They brought about some sense of nostalgia. She sighed; damn that useless brother of hers and his moping spells. When was Pavi returning from his escapade? He at least was of slightly better use and could take instructions.<p>

Her Eunuch returned in one piece announcing her brother's refusal to budge. She concealed her surprise at her Eunuch's healthy condition and dismissed him. Her brother must have some serious shit eating him and with another sigh, she rose and made her way to solve yet another problem plaguing GeneCo. She chose this, she reminded herself as regret pawed at her from inside.

* * *

><p>No…not dead. Can't be, just no fucking way. Damn idiot was smart enough not to get killed. Little shit lived with him for years, should be a testament to that.<p>

"Ooi, cunt!"

Not dead, impossible. No fucking way. Everyone liked that piece of shit. No, can't be. Just not possible. Never happened. Never fucking happened.

"Luigi!"

Not dead. Not possible. Still alive. Fucking thing was like a cockroach. Just wouldn't fucking die. No…. Just a dream. No possible, fucking way. Not real…

"Luigi, look at me damnit!" His face was roughly jerked up and unnatural blue eyes met his. "Luigi, you are fucking scaring me. What the hell is wrong?"

Pavi, dead, gone. "Two down, two more to go," he mumbled.

A sigh, "Luigi you idiot, I have no goddamned clue what you are going on about. Fine, do you want me to call Pavi to deal with your sorry ass?"

In a flash, he was on his feet and Amber was sprawled on the floor. "That's not fucking funny, Carmela."

"Fine! If you don't want my help, it's fine with me!" she spat as she stormed out the room.

He glared at the door long past Amber's exit. Fucking furious did not cover a tad of the swift rage coursing through his veins. Someone was going to fucking pay. No one laid a hand on his brother except for him. He was going to find the fucker who dared mess with a Largo and he was going to make that asshole wish he'd never been born. The Repo Man knew shit about pain compared to what he did.

* * *

><p>Gentern after Gentern fell victim to his blade. He'd try to get them to talk on whom Pavi had done that night. It was a fucking bust! Perhaps they'd known more than they let on but he had no patience to wait for their inane blabber and screeching. He ignored the grating voice on his watch ordering him to stop killing her staff. He scoffed; Luigi didn't take shit from no one. If that slut didn't give a shit about Pavi, he didn't give a shit about her either.<p>

* * *

><p>That fucking cunt was going to be the death of her. She reckoned she finally understood the frustration and hatred her father had for them. Even so, Luigi was acting out more than usual and that was saying something. He'd somewhat calmed after dad died, drank a lot less too. What the hell could have triggered this impromptu outburst?<p>

"Miss Sweet?" She looked up to the man in a suit. She couldn't have been bothered to remember who he was but she just could not place him in any department. "Miss Sweet, the arrangements for Mr Largo has been made, ma'am."

She blinked, "What the hell does Luigi want now?"

The man paused, "Not for Mr Luigi, ma'am; the younger Mr Largo. I'd," he swallowed, "I'd assumed you wanted me to make the funeral arrangements after his body was brought in."

"What body?" she recited. "Pavi said he was staying over on the mainland."

"Miss Sweet," he said in a condescending tone, "no one goes to the mainland anymore." He caught himself and used, what he probably assumed was, a comforting voice. "You ordered Mr Largo's body to be brought in 3 days ago."

Amber was hearing the voice but not the words. It didn't make sense. Pavi called. He said he was staying at the Mainland for a couple of days… but why would he be at the Mainland. It was more of a wasteland than Sanitarium Island could ever be. No! No, she was sure. "Check my phone records. Pavi called to tell me about his trip."

She caught the apologetic look her henchwomen exchanged with the man, "No records of calls from anytime this week, Ma'am."

"Oh please, you are asking me to believe that my brother has been dead for three days and I have heard nothing about it."

Her henchwomen swallowed, "You have ma'am but you ordered that no one brought it up and anyone who did, were fired or repossessed."

"No," she protested weakly.

The condescending tone returned, "Miss Sweet, perhaps it would be best if you follow me to examine his corpse. Perhaps you'd believe us then."

"No!" she cried. She felt stifled and needed out. She pushed past her Eunuchs and left the building with about as much grace she could muster in her current condition. She needed it to stop. Z was a perfect antidote and she knew exactly where to get it.

* * *

><p>Luigi held the knife with much precision at the barkeep's throat. "Three nights ago. Don't give me crap on not remembering. You little shits grovel when royalty steps in."<p>

"Please sir, I…I don't know much sir. He…he danced with many girls that night. I don't remember who he left with."

He slammed the man into the wall, "Who?"

The man squawked, "I think…I think it was James Allens' girl. He…he came in fairly pissed just before closing." His eyes darted to the knife, "P…please sir, that's all I know."

He dropped the rat onto the ground, still a sniveling mess. He called his Gopher to run the name. There wasn't a person on the island who had not had surgery. He approached the sniveling rat, knife held out. He wiped the blood on the barkeeps shirt and the fucking coward pissed himself. He sneered and left.

* * *

><p>Amber peered down at the man nestled in the dumpster. She wrinkled her nose at the smell, how the hell did she ever stand being near to him? "Get up Graverobber. I need a hit."<p>

The pale man smirked at her as he vaulted out. "I have been graced by the presence of the dear head of GeneCo. Should I bow?"

She glared at him and pulled back her collar. "Not in the mood, Graves."

He raised an eyebrow, "No hi, bye?" He pulled the suited girl close, "Not even a kiss for old time's sake?"

She pushed back, "Not interested." She threw the chips towards him, "I have the cash, now Z me."

He shrugged, pushed the blue vial into the gun then paused. "Want a drink, Sweet?" She saw through that suggestive smile and sighed. There was no convincing him otherwise. Fine, whatever. As long as she got her hit, she didn't care what he wanted.

* * *

><p>Amber glowered as the Graverobber played with his drink, the contents almost untouched. "Can't you hurry the fuck up?"<p>

"Haven't had a decent drink in years, Sweet. You want your shot or not?"

Amber fell silent and drummed her fingers on the table, patience long worn thin. She needed her hit or else…. She blinked and pushed back unwanted feelings. One shot, just one and she wouldn't need to feel a thing, nothing at all.

"So Sweet, you've been clean for a year now. Why the sudden change in heart? Your patronage would have lasted me months."

She said nothing. She was never hooked on Z, not really. It was the surgeries she craved, the image of perfection. Now, she wasn't the mere Voice of GeneCo, she _was_ GeneCo. She didn't have to stand there, giving off the image of the perfect Italian family. It was all irrelevant. _She_ was what they looked at now. Her looks and beauty were irrelevant, no more shoving and pushing for the spotlight or attention. It was her attention the world craved and it felt good, a real ego boost.

No, it was always the surgeries and Z was just a side effect. An addictive side effect but a side effect nonetheless. She'd gotten clean after taking over GeneCo; the one condition her brothers dangled in exchange for backing her. She never understood their reasoning though. It was almost as if they lost interest in the company after Daddy publicly disowned them.

"Sweet," the deep voice interrupted, "I'm going to regret telling you this tomorrow. You've been clean for a year now, far longer than anyone has ever tried. You are lucky enough to escape, why come back in?"

That one question nearly broke everything she was holding in. "I just want the pain to stop," she whispered to her drink pathetically. Graves sat silently before her. If she knew the fugitive, which she did, he'd have probably heard what had happened already. It was kind of a relief because it meant she didn't have to tell him. If she said it aloud, it would make it true.

The Graverobber placed a vial in her hand. "This is what you paid for even if I still prefer your old method of payment." She snorted, "Getting out of the habit the first time is hard enough, as far as I know the second times almost impossible. You are not a spoilt child anymore; can you really be standing around stoned half the time?"

"You've gotten soft, Graverobber. The kid's a bad influence on you." Graves laughed, took his bow and left.

* * *

><p>The house was a nightmare. In all honesty, she had no idea what to expect when she extracted the address from Luigi's Gopher. It was habitable that she would admit but it was far from hospitable and looking at it made her feel filthy. She found her brother in the living room frozen on the couch with what she assumed was a person dangling before him.<p>

She eyed the shredded skin and the empty sockets. She tried disgust but she knew the bastard deserved it. She eyed the crude disembowelment and sidestepped the intestines. This was the son of the bitch who killed Paviche but she didn't feel any anger or hatred. If anything, there was only a very vague sense of satisfaction but even that seemed forced.

"Pavi took the daughter's face and raped her. I put the bitch out of her misery. This bastard followed Pavi home and shot him." There was as much life in the voice as one could expect from reciting the phonebook.

She watched him stare blankly ahead, not unlike the way she found him in his room. She winced as she remembered her words and sobered up. Angry, destructive Luigi, she could handle. This shell, however, scared her. She grabbed him a little roughly by the shoulders and pulled him to his feet. "Come on, brother. Let's go back, I'll send a clean-up crew later.

"The fuck you are," he growled into her shoulder. "Let those commoners see what happens when you mess with a Largo." She didn't reply; that wasn't the publicity GeneCo needed at the moment. He'd be pissed when he found out but pissed Luigi was default mode. It wasn't anything she couldn't handle. Besides, there was enough Genterns to last him until he cooled down.

* * *

><p>Luigi sat half dressed on his bed; he hadn't the energy to pull on a shirt. Before at least he had a purpose, torture the asshole that hurt his brother, now there was nothing. Now, he was lost. If he was being honest, he has been lost for a year now. Since Dad… Helping Amber run GeneCo seemed to be the only thing keeping him together.<p>

She had arranged for the funeral to be tomorrow and had informed the press. It was going to be a joke, just as Dad's funeral had been. The press was more interested on whom the Wallace bitch was and whether Nathan really was the Repo Man. No fucking respect. It took all he could not to kill them but Dad would have been pissed. He was already a big enough disappointment.

Damnit! He couldn't do anything fucking right. His own father thought he was a monster and Dad had done some pretty nasty stuff. With his dying breath, Dad told them what a fucking failure they were and now… he couldn't even protect his little brother. He trembled as he remembered storming home after some idiot had messed up his coffee yet again. He cursed as something shattered beneath his feet. He snatched up the mirror with a growl, swearing he'd teach his brother for leaving his things everywhere. It was then he'd caught sight of his brother passed out on the ground. He was about to yell when he'd notice the crimson-

No! He couldn't go through that again. He pulled open the drawer and gently placed the jewel-encrusted mirror onto the table. The glass was shattered beyond repair. It was one of a kind; he should have watched where he was going. He had given it to Paviche the birthday after the accident. Paviche despised mirrors and dad removed every one of them in the house (with the exception of Amber's room because she had whine and bitch to no end). He hadn't known why he did it, even dad was furious. Dad probably thought he was mocking his brother or something. He knew the limit even if he didn't know why he had given it to Pavi anyway.

"Thank you-a brother, it's-a lovely." He looked up to see the seventeen-year-old boy standing before him. He'd forgotten how handsome Pavi was before his accident. A damn pity.

"Leave the mirror, it's broken."

The boy laughed, "It's alright-a, brother. There isn't-a much of a face to see anyway." A solid clay mask adorned the boy's face, large and clumsy. It hid any readable expression on Pavi's face, only the piercing eyes were visible.

"Do you hate me?"

The head tilted a little, "What-a do you think, brother?" Even the voice was unreadable, the Italian accent hiding any possible feeling.

"I think you should. It's my fault you're dead. You wouldn't have done it if it wasn't for me. All those years wishing I was the only child, I hated you, still do. You had everything I wanted. For 17 years, I dreamt of killing you in every way possible. I hated you with every fiber of my being, do you understand me?"

Even so, the eyes told him nothing. He'd forgotten how easy it was to pretend that Pavi felt nothing. He gave nothing away, hadn't for years. They'd all put on an image in public but Pavi never took his off. The charming womanizer that everyone loved, it was always so easy to pretend. "Dad loved the Pavi best."

Luigi released a hollow laugh, "I thought so too. I thought I made him proud." He remembered that conversation well. They'd gotten drunk after dad's funeral and it was the only time he could remember seeing Paviche. They called a truce on their sibling feud and it was the closest they'd been in years. Wonders what disownment can do to people. They had gone back to a cool indifference after but there was less fighting in the house, less anger and less resentment. It had become a home for the first time since Rotti turned aloof.

"I killed him, Paviche. I killed that son of a bitch that hurt you. It didn't change a thing. You're still dead. I made him beg to die; I killed his girl in front of him because I knew it would break him. Nothing changed. It's still my fault; it would always be my fault. Can't do shit right. It's a fucking pity you had me as your brother. You and Carmela would be so much better off." Luigi looked up again but Pavi was gone, mirror untouched on the dresser.

* * *

><p>The youngest Largo put on a light coat of make-up and straightened her dark dress. She hadn't had a surgery in months but she felt more like a porcelain statue than ever. She wiped off her lipstick and put on a tad darker shade, sighed at her reflection and pulled on her heels. She made her way with much elegance down the stairs only to see her brother seated and twitching in his ascot.<p>

He jumped to his feet as she cleared her throat, "You removed his face."

It wasn't a question. How had he found out? She tried to keep it as hushed as possible. She turned her attention to her nails, "It seemed right that he wouldn't wear someone else's face when he was buried." It seemed she had switched into CEO mode early that day.

"Damnit Carmela, he wouldn't even walk around the house without his mask on. Don't you dare, sister."

"Forget it; I'd already disposed of the faces." She approached her brother, ignoring the raised knife in his hand. "Whatever happened to his face doesn't matter. We are _not _embarrassed by it."

He looked away, shoulders slumped, "Yeah well, I am." He strode out to the limo first, unable to look her in the eye.

Her eyebrows furrowed as she watched her brother retreat. This was stupid and it wasn't fair. She was the youngest, why the hell was she playing the responsible one while her brother was allowed to fall apart. It wasn't fair.

She was about ready to crack when her Eunuch told her it was time to leave. She inhaled and her CEO persona fit back on. She did it for one funeral, there wasn't a reason she couldn't do it again. Yet, even as she walked to the car with that in mind, the Zydrate in her purse felt heavier than ever.

* * *

><p>"When I wanted to change my name and have my first surgery, Pavi was the only one who supported me. Pavi talked to dad and I did it. He could make anyone do whatever he wanted. It wasn't fair for him to have been taken so suddenly from us. He was my big brother and was everything I wanted to be. We will not forget him and his spirit will live on with us."<p>

Luigi stared at the floor, half listening to his sister's speech. It was exactly like the one she did for dad, professional and fake. Amber slid into her seat next to him; her fingers brushed his. She had asked him repeatedly to say something but he refused. He was not a press person and if anything, it'd probably end up the same mess as Dad's funeral. The next day, it was plastered across newspapers about how the young Miss Sweet had taken her brother's balls. Fucking press, their family was not for their gawking pleasure.

"Miss Sweet. Miss Sweet, please, a minute." Amber sighed at his side and muttered 'press control'. He didn't look at her as she walked off and didn't stand far enough from him. "Miss Sweet, you gave a press release that Mr Pavi Largo was killed," he twitched, "when he was robbed on his way home. Readers are curious as to why the press release came 3 days after Mr Largo's death. Would you also like to direct comments to the rumors that it was done out of anger by someone in GeneCo?"

He didn't need to turn to know the eyes were focused on him. Perhaps on another day he'd have killed them but not today. He didn't blame their reasoning; not really, it had always been a cheap excuse anyway. Did dad seriously think the press would buy it? They knew, they just didn't say a thing. They were cowards, all of them. When Rotti said jump, they jumped and prayed it was high enough. Idiots, all of them. He wanted to walk off but if he stood, he'd turn curious and look in that goddamned box. The box with his brother without a fucking mask, like shit he was. He wasn't going back there. Why didn't Amber understand? He couldn't do it. He couldn't see those fucking scars.

* * *

><p><em>That fucking whore, that'd show her. If she thinks she can fucking tell Luigi Largo what to fucking do, she was fucking mistaken. The pathetic part was he had actually liked the girl. A relationship that had lasted longer than a week, stupid bitch had to go and piss him off. <em>

_He took the elevator down to the labs; fucking Genterns were useless. Killing them would be perfect to cool his anger. The doors slid open to reveal his brother making out with some Gentern slut. "Get out Pavi," he growled, "You're not supposed to be here."_

_The teenager ignored him and continued feeling up the girl. His patience had long past its limit as he pulled the Gentern away and stabbed her. Pavi glowered at him, "That-a wasn't very nice, frattello."_

"_I don't fucking care about being fucking nice. Now get the fuck out."_

"_No."_

"_Excuse me?" He took a menacing step towards the defiant teen. _

"_I said-a no. I'm-a tired of-a you telling me what to do. I've-a been working on her for a week. You need-a to get laid, frattelo. The bella got-a tired of-a you, no?"_

_He snapped and shoved Pavi onto the ground. He straddled his brother and punched him once, twice until he lost count. Pavi didn't make a sound, didn't cry out; the little shit had pissed him off enough to know what would make things worse. _

_When he was satisfied, he got to his feet. Nothing had cracked so there wasn't any lasting damage and there was no reason to check his handiwork. He grabbed the cloth on the table and wiped the blood off his knife._

"_You're a fucking coward, brother. I'm-a not letting you push-a me around anymore. You're just-a jealous that women flock to the Pavi and you can't keep-a one little bella in line."_

_Luigi took the beaker next to his hand and threw the content at his brother. He'd only registered what he'd done when screams erupted from Pavi. All the anger seeped out and his blood froze. He glanced at the container in his hand. Fuck! Fuck! What had he done? He'd fucking threw acid at his brother. What had he-?_

_He just stared as his brother screamed. SurGens rushed into the room at the sound. They froze for a millisecond before rushing to do what they could. Luigi trembled, he fucking trembled for the first time in his fucking life. He had hurt his little brother. He didn't just knock him out or break his arm. Oh God, make him stop screaming. Stop screaming. Stop screaming.  
><em>

* * *

><p>"Stop screaming," he whispered. Forgetting himself and where he was, he dropped his head into his hands; so much for not going back there. He swore since that day, he swore he wouldn't lay a fucking hand on his brother, even if it was just a fucking smack to the head for being a fucking idiot. The little shit was fucking scared of him at first; refused to stay in the same room as him. That was why the mirror was so fucking important to Luigi. It meant his brother had forgiven him. God knew if Luigi could have done the same.<p>

He finally braced himself, walked to the fucking box and stared at his one real regret. The years had caused the wounds to heal up but it was still a horrific mess. He struggled keeping himself on his feet; if he was anywhere else, not surrounded by fucking cameras, he'd fall to his knees and sob like a fucking pussy. Even so, tears were already falling down his face.

"Paviche, I am so fucking sorry. I know this apology is 15 fucking years too late. I know I'm a fucking useless brother. I haven't done shit to deserve being called that. My fucking temper gets the best of me at times but I swear I'd never meant to hurt you, not like that. I would have done anything to have taken it back, I swear." He reached into his coat pocket and pulled out the mirror. He hesitated; he didn't want to give it up, his only solid keepsake of his brother. He closed his eyes and made a decision. Gently, he placed the shattered mirror under his brother's hand, stupid boy never went anywhere without it. Didn't seem right to separate them. "I am so sorry, Paviche."

He let the tears dry before he turned back to his seat. He didn't look up but he caught the look the masses sent him. It wasn't that far a leap really, the short tempered, trigger-happy Luigi shot his brother in his usual fits of rage. Amber muttered a sharp 'fucking idiot' as he took his place next to her. He found out later that she had listed Pavi's mirror as one of the things the robber took during the press release. Even as his street cred blew up a notch, it still hurt that even Amber had thought he could have killed one of his own.

* * *

><p>Amber awoke with a start; goddamned nightmares were keeping her up every night. She frowned slightly, rubbed the last remnants of sleep from her eyes and called her henchwomen. "How long has my brother been out?"<p>

There was a slight hesitation, "Just before you returned from work, ma'am."

"You know where he is. Now spill!"

Again, the hesitation shone through the line. The girl was fired if her brother could intimidate her so easily. "He's at the Fight Club on West Street, Ma'am. He's been there for a week now."

She groaned and dragged herself out of bed. She knew the club; stupid bastard was trying to get himself killed. She threw on the most respectable, casual garments she could find and ordered the limo to the club. She ignored the looks the men gave her. A year ago, she would have reveled in it, now she felt 20 years older than that girl.

She paid the bouncer who, with a lewd look, slapped her in the ass. Her brother was already in the ring, probably torn his shirt off ages ago. He was smaller than the giant swinging his knife wildly. All it took was a careful aimed strike and the match was over. It perturbed her how calculated it was, not even close to the venomous wrath she was used to.

She caught his attention and motioned him to the Limo. He glared at her, refusing to move. She sighed and told her bodyguards to fetch him. If they got themselves killed, it meant they weren't good enough to protect her. She went back to her limo to wait. It wasn't long before her brother was tossed in after her.

"What the fuck is wrong with you? Are you trying to get yourself killed? There are a dozen underground fighting arenas on the island and you choose the one where death is mandatory."

Luigi refused to meet her gaze and kept quiet. He was, she realized resignedly. The fucking idiot _was _trying to kill himself. She went through her purse and pulled out a handgun. She pushed it firmly into his hands, "The fuck?"

"Go on! You want to fucking off yourself then go ahead. Just do me a favor and put a bullet through my head first." The gun dropped with a resounding clatter. "It was your words brother, two down and two more to go. Are you really going to leave me alone?" Her voice turned raspy, tears that she refused to shed since she realized Pavi was really gone.

"I just want the pain to stop. Fucking house is too quiet."

Amber went back into her purse and pulled out a little glass vial. "You think I don't feel it? I know Z is the only thing that can make everything stop but I don't, because I swore. I swore to you and Pavi that I wouldn't touch Z, remember? Then you'd have my back when I took over GeneCo. Pavi broke his word, are you going to do the same?"

Luigi wouldn't look at her and she was terrified she wasn't getting through to him. "Fuck it Luigi! It's your job to tell me that this pain will stop. You are supposed to tell me that things will be alright. I'm tired of being the strong one. I can't even lie in bed and cry because it feels like once I start, I'd never stop."

Even through her tears, she was surprised as Luigi held her as if she was a child. "I'm terrified brother; I'm terrified all the time. We lost dad a year ago and now Pavi is gone. I…I don't want to be alone. I don't want to lose you too. As pathetic as it might sound, I dream about it every night. I don't want to come home one day and find out I'm the only one left. So please brother, for me?" God, she was a sentence away from saying something pathetically sappy. If only he'd see reason.

"A year ago you were kicking me in the crotch." She laughed; she couldn't help it. She was probably the only one who could get away with shit around Luigi, little sister privilege. Her poor brother never had peace from her, ever. She'd even gotten him to off a couple of her tutors with her sweet girlish charm.

She caught a smile on her brother's face and she laid her head on his shoulder. Sometimes she would guiltily think that she was happy Dad treated them the way he did at Mag's Final Opera. She for one had changed for the better. She grew up, was about time she did. She couldn't help but think had Dad left GeneCo to any one of them, they would have fallen further apart then they were a year ago. Last Christmas was the only Christmas she could remember when they felt like a real family. "Luigi, please."

He looked at her, "Alright Carmela, I won't leave you like everyone else did." Everyone else did….The number of funerals they'd been to was enough for anyone to put a gun in their mouths. She was lucky she guessed, she only had one mom and the bitch walked out on her. Luigi had three and he never knew his. She was kinda glad Nathan's whore never bothered to get to know them. Mag tried initially, guess she had to respect the singer for that; but she chose to leave as well and now she was dead.

"Thank you, Luigi. I don't care what dad said; I'm fucking proud of you and am glad you're my brother." What had she said? Just one sentence away from being sappy.

She received a whack on her head for her gracious words and strict orders to go to bed. As she walked up the stairs, she turned back to ensure Luigi had followed her. She released a breath she didn't remember holding as Luigi locked the door behind him and gave her a tired smile. She was still going to have nightmares but tonight at least she could sleep.

* * *

><p>Whoever that said the last step in dealing with grief was acceptance was a fucking idiot. There was no last step because the pain never stopped. There'd be times when Amber Sweet would wake convinced her brother was still alive or that she'd seen him pass her on the streets. There was always times where Luigi Largo would beat himself up for what happened to his brother. More than once little Carmela would take out her vial of Z wondering whether she'd really get hooked back on. The elder Largo broke every so often and spent countless nights at the Fight Club pulling back only because his sister's nightmares intensified. Grief was hard but they tried their best to get through because they knew if either of them succumbed to it, the other would suffer and neither could put the other through that kind of pain again.<p>

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><p><strong>AN: Heya, hope you guys liked it. The story has been sitting in my computer for almost 3 months and I finally had the courage to post it... Haha so anyway, some feedback and constructive criticism would be very much appreciated. Well... I guess that's it then. Thanks for taking the time to read and please leave a review on your way out.  
>TESTIFY <strong>


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